I am Bacon, the Herd Master General of the Great and Powerful Watercooler! State your purpose!
I'm an arm, but look, man. I'm stuck here. I think something is under my elbow if you could just give me...
Silence! Your plight makes me chuckle! And you have pleased the All Knowing, Ever Horny Watercooler! You may continue to pay homage to our beloved bubbler.
